Steph and I are incredibly lucky that BOTH of our parents are around and in good health. That is a luxury that we didn't have growing up that I am pumped and hopeful Henry will have it. Steph's paternal grandparents had passed away before she was born and I lost my paternal grandmother at an age such that I can't recall her memory. However, we both had good experiences with our living grandparents and they played an important role in our lives.....so along comes little Henry. Both parents thank God, and both sets of grandparents UH OH. You want to talk about baby crazy? Within minutes of his birth they were all there in the delivery room as loving and as supportive as can be....but a few days later some new monsters emerged ( story for another time ) ....hence the first story/post in this new series - Things I am going to do/NOT do when I am a grandparent.
1 ) Harangue My Child About the Sex/Name/ANYTHING about the the Baby :
In the weeks and months leading up to Henry's birth our parents were a little baby crazy ( mine a little worse ). Questions were flying around like a White House press conference ( which I am aware is their way of showing concern )...but the volume grew beyond my ability to respond and in some cases made us feel a little uncomfortable. In one instance it upset Steph and I when we found out Henry was going to be a boy but we were looking forward to surprising my parents until their constant pestering took the fun out of it and we caved. We told them to buy a baseball instead of a softball in order to put an end to the 18 calls in one hour, every hour for an entire afternoon.
Honestly, the best way to show concern is asking how we are doing as parents and prospective parents. We recognze you have had years with us ( and we have become boring to you all of a sudden ) and you are excited about the new addition but we need to be talked to like adults and not human hosts of your alien culture. It actually was my mom who was one of the first ( out of most friends and family ) to ask how I was doing when we were about 4 months pregnant. The relief almost made me misty as I was tired and a little stressed to that point and just needed to have my emotions stroked for a little while. SO the advice and take away is this, when that day comes when you are about to be a grandparent, realize that your soon to be parent is going to feel like they are hosting a press conference every hour, so act like a distinguished and respectful journalist and ask 1 or 2 really good questions every now and then. You can make it up to us by watching the baby so we can go to dinner more if you dont' want to play by these rules....hopefully by then we will have given up to the fact you have turned our well being into that of the baby's.